My mind is beginning to think that I have more than a long way to go. See the problem is that I look down the road and I can see an infinite tapestry of possibilities. But, within the winding road and all of the bright and shining sun, lay all of the obstacles, such as huge rocks, pot holes and shards of glass that want to destroy my front bumper and make my tires blow into a million tiny pieces. There goes my optimism and pessimism, the yin and yang of my mind at a never ending, till death battle, as the smell of burning rubber fills my nostrils.
It’s not that I am afraid of rejection; I actually accept it and welcome it with open arms. The letters that I may be getting in the near future are testaments to me trying to find a literary agent that believes in my characters as much as I do. All a rejection means is you haven’t found the right agent yet or your piece hasn’t reached its full potential. So, in this case, no, I do not mind receiving a form rejection letter. I actually am pretty excited about them. I think it may be the whole thrill of the chase/adventure/Indiana Jones complex I have though.
With this newfound novel expecting me to bust my ass for its life, resuscitating it and watching its little novel chest rise and fall, then taking care of it like a mother does her baby, I have found how stressful a life of writing can be. But, in the shadow of the stress and pessimism, I have been showered with the confidence to boost me over a wall and land on my feet- something Humpty Dumpty would be envious of. In the back of my mind I still wonder if it’s good enough for anyone and if anyone will ever care about the book I have almost spent a year of my life laboring over. In the end it’s all up to a nice woman or man in an office in a big city with so many other experienced and talented writers and their projects lying on their desks and the desks of all of the other nice agents who are working to push the work of those they believe in.
So, in my saying all of this crap, I would like to introduce myself- Hello, my name is Young Blood and I am SO ready to wrangle all of the stress and kick it down. But I know there will be many upon many obstacles and I’ve got my Jedi mind tricks and my Indiana Jones whip ready and my lion heart raised! And I have the advice of the amazingly knowledgeable, talented, nice and graceful Nicky Brown to live by: “With flexibility and a good attitude you've at least got a fighting chance.”
“And I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I’ve written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
I am a writer, I am all that you have hoped on”
-The Engine Driver, The Decemberists
“This is a gift, it comes with a price
Who is the lamb and who is the knife?
Midas is king and he holds me so tight
And turns me to gold in the sunlight”
Who is the lamb and who is the knife?
Midas is king and he holds me so tight
And turns me to gold in the sunlight”
-Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up), Florence and the Machine
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